Ebb and Flow of OCD

I guess that's how it works. Things can be going smoothly for a day or even a week or longer and I think I'm doing fine but that's the funny thing is it just can't stay smooth. There is a wave and I never know when it will occur. This weekend I have been experiencing alot of anxiety. It's the summer days of having the kids home I think. We don't have something to do every second and then that can cause friction. My daughter's good friend that lived next door moved and her other friend is sick with mono. so is on bed rest for a month. She doesn't seem to want to meet any other friends but complains about being bored and having no one to play with. My anxiety starts to go crazy when she is bored and has nothing to do and we have been arguing with each other lately which we usually don't. I think I usually let her have alot of things her way when my OCD is going crazy and then when I have to crack down on her and I'm not even raising my voice she says I'm yelling at her. It's hard. I love her so much and I just want what is best for her. I was letting her stay up later until 8:30 or 9:00 because I thought she could handle it in the summer. I was wrong. I also was thinking how nice it's been that she hasn't been so whiny and mood swings but I think lack of sleep brought all that back full swing. I have just felt like I'm going to lose my mind the past few days. Our floor still isn't finished. It looks the same as the picture in the previous post. We attempted to finish it but my husband said he has to have his dad help him. He doesn't really have much experience with a saw and isn't able to do the cuts needed. I want my floor finished now. I am trying very hard to be patient but I am losing patience quickly. Oh yes, how could I forget. We went and picked up my daughter's friend that moved today and they are playing now outside. It's such a coincidence (HA, HA, HA,HA, HA) that there was a nice big bottle of ROUND-UP sitting on the sidewalk ready to go do some weed spraying. I don't know if they already did some or not so of course I am worried that the friend probably has some on her shoes and even though I have them take there shoes off it somehow will get on the padding laid out before the laminate floor goes on it. I am venting if you can't tell. This is a moment of anxiety. I am letting my daughter take slimy tadpoles out of our pool now and TOUCHING them while she puts them in containers to take to the park and put in the stream. Ick, I must be CRAZY!