The last couple weeks I have just felt so overwhelmed with anxiety. It has been affecting me physically. I have been carrrying it all in my neck and shoulders and having alot of headaches. My dog is barking right now and it sounds like a mega phone blasting in my ears. I always am sensitive to noise but when anxiety is high then it's worse. I know that I haven't been taking my clonazepam and there would be some relief with that but I just don't want to become dependant on it. It is an addictive drug which I don't feel addicted too and my doctor said it's such a low dose I shouldn't become addicted. It's probably my ocd that thinks I shouldn't take it. I did read something saying that your body can have a hard time relaxing itself if you have been taking a benzopene for a long period of time. I'm pretty sure some excercise would help but easier said than done. I have such a hard time getting myself or finding a method of excercise since I experience social anxiety as well. My breathing has been in a hyper-ventilation way even though others wouldn't notice. My shoulders and back just aching and on fire then causing sore muscles throughout my back up into my neck and causing headaches. I've had to take ibuprofen every day and lay with a heating pad on my neck and back. It mostly all started when I decided I was going to stop watching my toddler nephew. I have been watching him for several years and I decided I'm done. I just felt so guilty about it. There are some other issues in the family too but I know that really got me going. Once my body starts feeling that way it takes a while for it to feel better.
Thankfully the sun was out yesterday and today. That is always nice.
Hi Kim. Sorry about the trouble you've been having with anxiety. It is awful - it penetrates every part of your life.
ReplyDeleteFeeling guilty is rough. It's a painful emotion. I could tell you not to feel guilty, but I know that is useless. We can't change what we feel. But we can change what we believe. You can believe that you did a wonderful thing watching your nephew for many years. You can believe that you helped out your family by doing so. You can believe that you needed a break from babysitting. You can believe that you have the right to make these decisions for yourself, for your health, and for your family. And if you believe these things, then you can see that there is no reason for guilt and hopefully the guilt will melt away.
Anyway, I don't know if this helps, but I hope it does. My doctor has spent a lot of time challenging my beliefs to find the real truth of each situation, and I find when I do that, a lot of my negative feelings dissipate. Hope you feel better.
Hey Kim, sorry you're having a rough time. Something that helps me with thoughts of guilt over something like that is to tell myself that other people do things like this all the time. It's okay to stop doing something if you're feeling overwhelmed with it - OCD related or not. It really helped me to decide that my happiness came first - when I stopped trying so hard to please other people at the risk of my own feelings, it was as if a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders.
ReplyDeleteSpeaking of easing the pain in your shoulders - I had an exercise that I learned in a drama class, believe it or not, that helped me relax. Basically you lay down and focus on relaxing one part of your body at a time. You can either start at the top or bottom, but I like to work my way down.
I close my eyes and then tell myself (silently in my head) to relax my head. Then to relax my face. Then to relax my neck. Then to relax my shoulders. Then my ribcage. Then my stomach. Then my hips - etc, all the way down to my toes. It really helps me let go of tension -both physical and emotional.
Good luck! Sending e-hugs your way!~
Hi, there. I'm sorry you've had some much anxiety lately and that it's affecting you physically. I hear you, because I carry my anxiety in my body, too, especially my neck, upper back and my jaw. Sometimes I will suddenly realize that I'm clenching my jaw or my hands, and sometimes I don't even know why.
ReplyDeleteStretching and yoga moves help me. Getting down on the floor and stretching my muscles and listening to my breathing helps me.